The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Exciting adventures IRL.
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Sly Boots
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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Sly Boots » Wed Jan 15, 2020 10:29 pm

I'd be legitimately gutted if Jeff died :(

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Sly Boots » Thu Jan 16, 2020 8:55 am

Although... apropos of nothing, is Jeff capable of wearing a belt? :-"

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 9:05 am

:lol:

He could sling it across himself like a bandolier. I feel like he'd be channelling the angry steel-mohawk version of Johnny Five from Short Circuit 2.

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Sly Boots » Thu Jan 16, 2020 9:17 am

Wrathbone wrote:
Thu Jan 16, 2020 9:05 am
:lol:

He could sling it across himself like a bandolier. I feel like he'd be channelling the angry steel-mohawk version of Johnny Five from Short Circuit 2.
That's the spirit! :)

If nothing else, I feel like befriending an evil creature, freeing him to wreak havoc upon the land and finally coercing him into sacrificing himself to save the world would be very on-brand for the Unmentionables :lol:

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 9:51 am

Four weddings and a funeral within a day, all for Jeff?

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 1:07 pm

The party followed in the shadows as the decaying, enraged form of Sir Carac shambled down the steps towards the subject of his vengeance: the vampire, Leopold Von Netrecht. Sir Carac called out to his prey, only to be dismissed in mockery. The vampire then paused and considered that Sir Carac could only have escaped with help from others, and as his red eyes pierced the darkness they stopped upon Sage, clinging high on the wall like some kind of legally-distinct Spider-Chap. Leopold was pleased to see one of his liberators had come to visit him in his new lair, and he reasoned that rather than joining the wretched corpse of an ex-paladin in some foolish quest for revenge, Sage and the vampire should come to an equitable arrangement instead. Not one to turn down an opportunity for profit by dealing with an ancient being of terrors untold, Sage agreed to hear him out, much to Sir Carac’s consternation. Leopold proposed that if Sage were to leave and not tell anyone about his new residence, the vampire would lend his combat prowess in the upcoming battle. He also suggested that should Sage wish to lure any of his enemies down to the catacombs, it could be mutually beneficial.

It would be innacurate to say Sage nobly dismissed this offer out of hand. Nevertheless, after pondering the benefits and potential neck-bites involved with a vampiric deal, Sage unleashed a flurry of eldritch punishment on Leopold. Sir Carac and the rest of the party joined the fight: Slythe peppering the vampire with arrows from the shadows; Charr enveloping his quarry in flames; Sir Carac belching the dragonfire with with he had been imbued; and Hamfist getting confused by the vampire's charms and pummelling Charr with his holy mace. Leopold quickly found himself outmatched, and even as he called his swarms of bats to aid him (legal status of the Batfellow moniker pending), he faltered as Sir Carac's vengeful gaze paralyzed him in retribution. Charr's unrelenting fire incinerated his physical form, but the vampire retreated to his coffin as a cloud of mist. The retreat was of little use to the ancient monster, however, as the party followed and swiftly ended its reign of blood with a stake to the heart. Sir Carac's anger dissipated immediately, and with his senses apparently recovered he thanked the party for freeing him from his curse. With that, he collapsed and finally met his true death. Several days and countless murders after accidentally unleashing Leopold Von Netrecht upon Neverwinter, the Unmentionables had found something resembling... well, not exactly redemption, but closure perhaps.

Moving swiftly on from the awkward situation of standing around Sir Carac's malodorous corpse, the party headed back to the catacomb's exit to find it guarded by a small army of skeletons, along with the ghostly woman who had asked them to complete the ritual to turn Vexius into a lich. The ghost questioned why the ritual had not been completed, and as they struggled to concoct a convicing lie, who should appear to save the day but their old friend Jeff! Jeff, having arrived in town for his ill-considered wedding, had been directed to the party's location by presumably terrified guards, no doubt leaving a trail of unintended destruction in his wake. The party quickly conscripted Jeff into their ranks and assured the ghost the ritual would be dealt with immediately as they scuttled off back to Vexius's tomb and filled Jeff in with the details. The grand plan, they decided, was to destroy Vexius's body and then cheese it.

The Unmentionables wrenched the lid off the Sarcophagus. Before them lay the decayed body of Vexius, whom they set Jeff on with his eyebeams. Unexpectedly, Vexius awoke with an unholy screech and leapt out of the coffin as a part-corpse, part-wraith monstrosity. The party attacked without hesitation and swiftly slaughtered Vexius, but not before he cut off one of Jeff's precious eye tentacles. Worse, the deck of many things, one of the relics used in the ritual to raise Vexius, burned a hole through Sage's backpack and released Vexius's soul back to his undead form. Once again the party took him down, with Jeff being even more severely hurt with festering, necrotic wounds. This time Vexius did not rise, but the resulting noise of ghostly fury from down the corridor warned the party that the skeleton army was on its way to them.

With few options left, the Unmentionables destroyed the remaining artefacts from the ritual. As the ring melted, the skeletons marched round the corner only to collapse in a heap of bones. The party returned to the exit, where the ghost screamed at them: "I curse your eyes! I curse your faces! I curse your BONES." And with that, she disappeared, probably never to be referenced again. Spent, wounded and significantly richer, the Unmentionables had successfully secured the catacombs.
I've also determined what the sword and helm found in Vexius's tomb are, but I'll hold off on details until they're identified.

Also-also, it's occurred to me that it may be unclear from the events, but the deck of many things is still intact and able to be used - it is simply free of the taint of Vexius now.

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Sly Boots » Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:07 pm

Another grand write up of our (mis)adventures :)

Re the weapons, I can cast identify and have spell slots available, we could always say that as the group milled about considering it's next move (where we left off basically), I identified our loot, which gives us a bit of a chance to ponder how it might be best used prior to the next session?

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:30 pm

Yep, that's fair!

The black sword is a Sword of Vengeance.

https://www.dndbeyond.com/magic-items/s ... -vengeance

And the helm is a Dread Helm.

https://www.dndbeyond.com/magic-items/dread-helm

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Sly Boots » Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:35 pm

Wrathbone wrote:
Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:30 pm
Yep, that's fair!

The black sword is a Sword of Vengeance.

https://www.dndbeyond.com/magic-items/s ... -vengeance

And the helm is a Dread Helm.

https://www.dndbeyond.com/magic-items/dread-helm
Yikes! I knew it would be cursed :lol:

Which type of sword is it, out of interest (eg greatsword, longsword etc), or can we choose?

I think I should get the helm by default, seeing as I'm the only party member who can't already make his eyes glow at will!

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:56 pm

It's technically a longsword, but it's large enough that it could feasibly be used two-handed as a greatsword.

(For the sake of flexibility in game terms, I'll say that one-handed it's 1d8 but two-handed it's 2d6 rather than the usual 1d10 for a longsword).

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Sly Boots » Thu Jan 16, 2020 3:45 pm

Wrathbone wrote:
Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:56 pm
It's technically a longsword, but it's large enough that it could feasibly be used two-handed as a greatsword.

(For the sake of flexibility in game terms, I'll say that one-handed it's 1d8 but two-handed it's 2d6 rather than the usual 1d10 for a longsword).
Ok, shall definitely pass in that case, as I'm all in on finesse weapons.

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Mantis » Thu Jan 16, 2020 3:56 pm

Wrathbone wrote:
Thu Jan 16, 2020 1:07 pm
Also-also, it's occurred to me that it may be unclear from the events, but the deck of many things is still intact and able to be used - it is simply free of the taint of Vexius now.
:twisted:

What's the policy on it, do cards that are drawn vanish from your hand and reappear somewhere shuffled into the deck again?

It's in Sage's chaotic nature that some cards are being drawn from that deck at some point.

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 4:03 pm

Once a card is drawn, it will return to the deck and could potentially be drawn again.

Introducing the deck may have been a really terrible idea. :lol: But where's the fun in D&D if you can't allow for wildly risky eventualities (and equally ludicrous bonuses)?

EDIT - As a precaution, if you going to draw a card.... maaaaaybe have a backup character ready just in case. ;)

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Mantis » Thu Jan 16, 2020 4:13 pm

I never said that I was going to be the one drawing the cards. -_-

I seem to recall when I rolled an arcana check on the deck Sage only was able to identify it but doesn't really know what any individual card does, just that some are good and some are very very bad.

In the event that he loses his soul or gets trapped somewhere I may roll his dad as a character and make it his quest to find him. :lol: If we did ever die would you want us to make someone at level 1 or somewhere closer to our current level?

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Re: The return of the D&D campaign: This time it's potatoes

Post by Wrathbone » Thu Jan 16, 2020 4:18 pm

If you died beyond recovery or otherwise became indefinitely missing or incapacitated, I'd say a new character should be at the current level of the party.

I'm now considering what would happen should Hamfist gain the ability to alter reality to his whim. :-k

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