I Just Watched (Films)

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Snowy
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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Snowy » Sat May 21, 2022 8:53 am

The Northman

What a steaming pile of old faeces this is. You have the entire Viking age which has some fantastic stories in it at your disposal, a massive Hollywood budget and some really talented actors. So you make a film that goes off again and again into quasi-mystical bollocks and a plot that is so fucking stupid it is risible. From an early scene where the (young) Northman and his father are crawling round pretending to be a pair of wolves because no-reasons, they start throwing 10+ minute scenes of utter made-up wank at you.

You then have the accents. They are pissing awful. Danes, Norwegians, Swedes speaking English have an accent but are perfectly understandable but the American actors trying to replicate it just can't do it. I suppose having them ape a Scandinavian accent is better then them acting with a broad American accent (I am looking at you Kevin Costner playing Rahbin Hooood) but it is bad, and they are so focused on the accent they mangle the actual words quite often.

So frustrating, they get so many little details spot on. The warriors sitting on sea-chests as they row their drakkar longships for example. Then they undo it with having the main characters run around virtually naked despite all their opponents wearing mail, or yet another dose of made up quasi-mystical dribblings.

And the plot. Bugger me it is weak.
Spoiler
Son of a king murdered by his brother grows up to be a respected warrior. Finds out that his murderous uncle has lost his kingdom somehow and fucked off to live in Iceland. What do do then, take a longship and some warriors to Iceland to take your revenge? No, why not instead brand yourself as a slave (never once referenced as a thrall), sneak onto a ship full of other slaves headed to Iceland. Find the night-blade that won't come out of it's scabbard unless it is dark (honest) and dribble towards a predictable ending.
Too long and too shit. Do yourselves a favour and avoid it.
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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Raid » Sat May 21, 2022 9:35 pm

Skyfall

This isn't just the best Bond film (I'll fight anyone that says otherwise), it's one of my very favourite films, certainly in my top 10, maybe in my top five. It's staggeringly good looking in places, phenomenally well lit in many of the key scenes (pure pornography to an amateur photographer), but also incredibly well acted from the main players. It forges and then draws on an emotional connection between long-running characters that didn't really exist prior, with Dench and Craig pulling it off perfectly. It has a perfect level of nostalgia for fans of the series without ever feeling gratuitous in the way that Star Wars does it. The classic bass-guitar twang coming in when Bond and M drive off in the DB5 is a masterful subversion of the subversion that we'd had from Craig's entries up until this point, as is the reappearance of the traditional intro sequence right at the end.

It's a damn near perfect film; appealing to long-running fans while not languishing in the past.

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by ManBearSquid » Sun May 22, 2022 8:37 pm

Sicario

Finally watched my first non-sci-fi Villeneuve and it was as brilliantly made as ever. Fucking grim film with palpable tension throughout.

Drive

I'd kind of seen this before with constant interruptions from my ex. Finally sat down to give it a proper go and I enjoyed it.

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Achtung Englander » Mon May 23, 2022 12:21 pm

Snowy wrote:
Sat May 21, 2022 8:53 am
The Northman
Apparantely it tanked at the box office.
Games playing : Bioshock (Remastered) / Total War Britannia / Dirt 4

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Snowy » Mon May 23, 2022 3:29 pm

Achtung Englander wrote:
Mon May 23, 2022 12:21 pm
Snowy wrote:
Sat May 21, 2022 8:53 am
The Northman
Apparantely it tanked at the box office.
I am not surprised. My wife, knowing me and my love of history, smiled and said she would be happy to watch The Northman with me after it garnered loads of positive press (even though I know it is not her bag). We sat through the opening scenes, but when the king and his son were crawling around the floor pretending to be dogs/wolves, I looked across and could see a cocked 'WTF' eyebrow. "Ummm, what's going on?" she enquired politely, clearly not wanting to shit on a film about an era that really interests me. "I think they are fucking it up sweetheart" I replied. Wasn't wrong.
RCHD wrote:Snowy is my favourite. He's a metal God.
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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Snowy » Mon May 23, 2022 3:30 pm

In other news, tonight I am off to see the 35th anniversary screening of Robocop at the cinema.

Apart from making me feel old, I shall award this a pre-emptive 10/10

Can you flyyyyy Bobby?
RCHD wrote:Snowy is my favourite. He's a metal God.
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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Sly Boots » Mon May 23, 2022 3:38 pm

I'd buy that for a dollar.

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Sly Boots » Mon May 23, 2022 3:39 pm

The PWF Robocop watchalong is one of my happiest memories of the old forum :D

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Raid » Mon May 23, 2022 3:48 pm

Robocop 2 is on Prime Video...

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Sly Boots » Mon May 23, 2022 4:17 pm

Raid wrote:
Mon May 23, 2022 3:48 pm
Robocop 2 is on Prime Video...
All the films after the first one are a bit pants, aren't they?

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Raid » Mon May 23, 2022 4:26 pm

I genuinely can't remember, although I'm sure it's not a patch on the first (largely because there aren't many films that are).

A forum watchalong sounds like fun though, I wasn't part of any of the old PW ones.

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Animalmother » Mon May 23, 2022 5:06 pm

Snowy wrote:
Mon May 23, 2022 3:30 pm
In other news, tonight I am off to see the 35th anniversary screening of Robocop at the cinema.

Apart from making me feel old, I shall award this a pre-emptive 10/10

Can you flyyyyy Bobby?
I saw reshowings of Aliens and The Thing in the cinema and can easily say it was the greatest experience ever. Would love to see Robocop on the big screen.

Robocop 2 had some great ideas but isn't a good film. It was surprisingly brutal even for a Robocop film in places.

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Snowy » Tue May 24, 2022 6:34 am

It was brilliant, as expected.

I have seen showings of Jaws and Alien in the past which have also been great.
RCHD wrote:Snowy is my favourite. He's a metal God.
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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Wrathbone » Tue May 24, 2022 6:55 am

Sly Boots wrote:
Mon May 23, 2022 4:17 pm
Raid wrote:
Mon May 23, 2022 3:48 pm
Robocop 2 is on Prime Video...
All the films after the first one are a bit pants, aren't they?
All I remember of Robocop 2 is him walking into an arcade and shouting "Shouldn't you kids be in school?!", which is mildly funny, although I think that's where the film peaks. My only recollection of 3 is something about him flying.

So yes, pants.

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Re: I Just Watched (Films)

Post by Alan » Tue May 24, 2022 7:27 am

BEEEEHAVEEEEEEEE YOURSELVES!
A man who could tell more truth and eat fewer pies.

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